Santiago Blues

Inspired by Mexico City Blues - Kerouac
============================

When you get broken down, when you get beaten up
When the wine don't come to the top of your cup
When you get surrounded by phonies, encircled by cheats
Treated like just another cut 'o' meat

Well you gotta stand up strong
You gotta stand up tall
You gotta stand so your back's to the wall
So you's got no place to fall
You got no bridge to burn
And you could fight your way out machete in hand
From beach of golden sand to gilded hall
Where Montezuma balls out rhymes
In Language of gold
In hall of old
Though ruin lies on that road

Life it makes death
Words are captured under bated breath
In gin soaked house
On mountain high
Stoned in castles in the sky
Yes, I been ruminating on the history of man
Of Custer's last stand and the blade that Cortez carried in his hand

Well yaaaas, them halls be gold
Blind man says you pick your road
Go north, south, east, west
Pick which you like best and fuck the rest
Yes I heard them restless sheep beatin n bleatin
N I saw 'em stone a guy
People these days they don't stop to ask why
Cos yes, they blind, they deaf and theys dumb
N the self appointed witch doctors decide
Who has the fun and who gets the gun
In the land of the blood red setting sun

In kangaroo courts judgement is cast
Amidst speculation so vast
Two dozen hardened eyes chastise
And the voice of the wise gets drowned
So all yous here is that low down gurgling sound

Well them heads bow down to the ground
N them capitalist cathedrals dance to the sky
N neath a railway bridge
Kerouac he been drinking whiskey n rye
Well you know, Dylan ain't dead
It's just that old space in my head,
Needs reshapin', relacin', rewirin'
Cos I'm aspirin' to somethin' better than life's lonesome race

No, I can't stay in one spot, one place
Face the bullshit of the daily race
Of the morning news
Mornin' blues as I reach out n jackhammer snooze
Yes, I said, what am I doin'
Where am I goin'
What am I throwin' at the wall
Which way them damn chips gonna fall
My Ma, she breaked down n balled 'n' said
You gotta live life for yourself and follow your dreams
Else you wake up in ten years n scream
Where'd it go
Who I know
Goddam this life of mine sure blows

Well yaaas you gotta find yourself a gal
Who don't laugh at your looks
Your books
Your face
Who appreciates that it ain't easy for ya
To base your life on the acquisistion of material wealth
But, health, love, joy, happiness
There's more to life n they don't know it
They're too busy wrapped up in their ribbons and bows

Boy they sure is dumb
You can't take it with ya
Not even that offshore accoutn ya hidin
And it's all gonna come down to one moment right
When you got your bullet to bite
S'okay you can take it right
N you can say, well it sure was good
N I'm sure glad I understood
N I done my time n wrote my rhyme on the bathroom floor
N when he come knockin on your door
Don't get sick like the smell of fish when they fryin'
Just say so long babe 'n' get busy dyin'

Biblical Punishment

I like to read history, mythology and a bunch of stuff, looking for interesting stories and inspiration.

Because I am a bonafide scholar I have been using the amazing brick testament. For those unaware the brick testament consists of the main bits from the bible acted out in lego, and photographed, fucking amazing, hats off I know. I found Genesis 34 pretty Machiavellian and interesting.

Jacob with the 'walls of jericho' ahahaha...

 Jacob, favoured by God because he wrestled him for a few hours and wouldn't let go, by all accounts a genocidical bastard has a daughter Dinah. Now Dinah gets raped by men from the city of Schechem, one of whom, in an old world twist of wierdness then wishes to marry her. Jacob's sons Simeon and Levi agree to inter-marriage as long as the men of the city of Shechem agree to be circumcised. Seems a reasonable deal right? Anyway they go along with it...
















The next day when the circumcised men are bedridden in pain Levi and Simeon descend upon the town and murder everyone and loot the shit out of the town. Now that's some special sort of fucked up, who does that, who thinks like this? God's chosen people, wow, scary, kinda impressive!

See here for Genesis 34 - Rape of Dinah

Long distance relationship blues

Some thoughts from a time during a long distance relationship

Long distance relationship blues
====================

My heart it aches and my mind it cries,
My shoes don't fit and I sleepless lie,
And I miss your hair and the shape of your face,
As each small problem causes my mind to race

And it longs for you and the weight of gravity that brings me through,
Back to earth and away from my mind,
From the curve of your back and the small of your thighs, my mind can't hide,
And my distance belies the weight of our distance upon my mind

I see you everywhere I go, in the shower, and my bed you know,
When I wake up I think I know that you are beside me but no,
My mind it lies and the cold sheets bely my mind's lies,
You're  not here, the fact my mind tries to hide

And I live in a dream that is not mirrored in reality,
And is this healthy and how it's meant to be,
And am I not again in my head,
From where you try to drag me,
And as I hang on for the next time,
I think am I not subjecting myself to unusual torture of the mind

Every time it has become harder,
As we become closer and the chasm looms larger,
And fortnight to safe harbour,
Seems so far

Memories fade,
And I relate that you're out tonight and I lie awake and I wish I could be by your side,
But our lives run asynchronously,
And that is a difficult lesson,
And I tire of text chats and pigeon typed messages and I grow increasingly frustrated,
I can't express myself and I want to throw my phone at a wall,
I can't make myself understood and I feel hollow

Because sometimes I can't cope with general life,
My coping mechanisms are subpar and I turn my phone off and hide,
Bar my door, descend into mood and try and cope,
And you can't see me and you can't know,
And it's not fair to treat you that way I know,
But if you were here you might understand and know,
That I still love you,
And I don't want to go,
And I want to cry and I want to scream,
I want to wake up from this macabre dream

Budapest

My first poem, written at 5 in the morning having stayed up drinking all night with a swedish girl I met caving.

Budapest,
why do your bars close early,
why do you have muscle on the metro,
why do you have a blues bar that doesn't play music,
crazy locals with 50 yard killer stares, trippy teahouses,
girls in bars selling carrots, fight or eat Mary Jane.

Budapest,
why are you full of Americans on spring break, red blood,
red blood, countless stupid things to be done,
why do you have scary transylvanians,
drinking from the bloody cup,
hunting drunk Germans with dark face and darker intentions.

Budapest,
why do your skies open and your winds rip,
covering the town, erasing the trail of revelry,
of a chance encounter,
of a stolen kiss,
of a last embrace,
of the shared beauty and knowing of the midnight hour with a blanket of snow.

Budapest,
why do you give then take,
wrought then break,
leave me in the light of morning with a cold dawning and a painful head,
knowing that she's not here,
that she's in the air,
in the the sky,
on her way back to Dr Gonzo, Scooby Doo, Schnapps, Europop, swearing parrots, Malmo FF and sleep.

Budapest, why do your bars close so early?

Searchin

One of my first poems, searchin, here's the link to my soundcloud with a performance:
link


Searchin
========

Well yes I been searchin for some answers now
Up n down the line
In the smile of a pretty girl
In the innocence of a child
In the bottom of a bottle
The butt of a blunt
Ever onwards, an endless hunt

Been lookin for a while now
A couple of years or more
Lookin since it all came crashin down
Upon the kitchen floor
They say a door closes, a window opens
Guess I've been startin to feel the breeze
That mean old east wind done knocked me to my knees

I been lookin in foreign lands that I never been to before
On a seven hour train
In a swedish hire car
Up and down this continent, near n far
Atop a Magyar Citadel
A snowcapped Austrian peak
But it ain't no Delphi now n I'm just about too drunk to speak

Yes I've taken some things now, strangled up my mind
I ain't leavin no stone unturned
Not even the metaphysical kind
Had to hear what it was all about
Rolled up twenties, makin me spout
I smoked stuff till my eyes got sore
I hear the crackle n the pop
Mary Jane knockin at the door
Well I guess I came up empty handed
Rising from the deep
When I look upon that good time picture I hang my head n weep

But I know that I gotta keep movin on down the line
With Frank in my ear and the horizon in my eye
For what is the point of existence
With no objective in sight
I live in the present tense
It's from here I sing of my plight

When I see birds

When I see birds I wonder,
Why are they here,
They could be anywhere,
By wing, by flight,
Over the channel by midnight,
Why are they here,
In a bustling city,
Aint the sort of place I'd think they'd find pretty n call home

When I see birds I wonder,
Why am I here,
I could be anywhere,
By car, by plane,
Why am I here,
In a grimy city,
Aint the sort of place I'd think I'd find pretty n call home

Where do birds go when it rains?
Do they head south to Spain,
And eat paella and dance salsa under andaluscian stars?

Where should I go when it rains,
Should I head south, hop a freight train,
Or board some budget no leg room plane,
In hope of sunnier climes,
Happier times,
And cheap continental wine

Maybe it's them air currents,
That take em unwillingly,
Like them currents o' life,
That tangle us up,
Turn us around,
Stop us from getting birds eye picture n lie of the ground

I guess they're here just like me,
Hung up on used to be's,
Well I guess it's really the mind that sets you free,
And not wings

===========
Written in Brum